OPINIOn

Good morning, newspaper world!
Lizzie Locker
Editor

It feels like morning here at the Spectator.

At least, it feels that way for your new editor – that is, me. It feels like I’m waking up at the crack of dawn to face a new day, one that I know will be chock-full of bad things, and just as many wonderful things: stress headaches that can only be cured with rolling-chair races; speedily-approaching print deadlines chased with mini-celebrations in the aftermath of the successful edition; maybe even harsh backlash following a particularly well-written exposé. 

Being the new editor, I have enormous shoes to fill – and my little feet seem awfully tiny. There is so much I still don’t know how to do, and so many behind-the-scenes duties that go with running a newspaper that I still have not learned. I worry that without that knowledge to fortify me, I might not be strong enough to keep my responsibilities from crushing me before I’ve even got my foot in the door.  

It’s a bizarre feeling to look around this office and realize that all the people in it are going to let me guide them over the next year – me of all people, the one who just over a year ago was little more than a glorified office minion.

But they aren’t placing their trust in a fool. I may not feel prepared, but I know that I actually am. I’ve been working towards this job for years, and even though the overwhelming reality of the situation has hit me hard and fast, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I can do this. I know that I can do it well, and maybe even (dare I say it?) better than anyone before me.

I’ve got a lot of support too. I have a well-oiled machine of a staff this year, all of whom have a great deal of experience under their belts. I’ve also got a team of contributing writers who are always willing to go far above and beyond the call of duty for a story. And of course, our sponsor, Eric Harlan, is always there for all of us when we need a hot lead on a story or a cheesy joke.

So there’s nothing for me to fear, not really. Whatever my doubts may be, and however they may keep me awake some nights, I will do this job the best way I know how. I am confident that that will be enough – and that I will be enough

A culture of shallow news puts audiences in deep trouble
Our View

This country needs to sort out its priorities.

Our self-destructive habits of over-indulging, over-spending, and over-stressing are compromising the positive and creative habits and ideals that raised this country up from a fledgling nation into one of the great powers of the world. These dangerous appetites are reflected in many aspects of American society, but one of the strongest is the current incarnation of the media.

Many people consume very little information that is not directly related to either some mindless celebrity or a way to keep up with the Joneses. Lose weight, look younger, wear what Snooki wears and find out why Jennifer Anniston doesn’t need a man to be a mom. The list goes on and on, racing to the non-existent finish line of what now passes as the American Dream.

If you can be financially independent while doing no work at all, apparently you’ve made something of yourself and seized all this great country has to offer, right? It is certainly understandable why the populace wants to consume media that preaches this message. First, the world at large is hurting economically. There are no easy outs anymore and the once-proud tradition of earning a living wage through hard work and dedication is becoming less and less common as the jobs Americans once held proudly are being eliminated and outsourced.  People are becoming jaded. The constant news of financial turmoil and professional strife are no longer just abstract notions for the bigwigs upstairs.

They have finally reached the population’s day-to-day lives, so why in the world would the common person want their news media to be about something that is not only negative, but already constantly being exposed to them both at work and at home?

Second, our media is built around the very old and very well-worn idea of the infallible leader. It goes all the way back to ancient civilizations. If a god-king, or in the modern vernacular, reality TV star, is on top and the focus of attention, they have surely been deemed worthy by some form of authority. Religious, political, social, it doesn’t matter which. All that matters is if someone is at the top, it is easy to believe that they are there for noble and honest reasons. After all, there is certainly no way that a person could ever achieve a quality lifestyle worth respect unless they were on TV.  Also, the simple fact that they have achieved such fame means they must be the ideal role models, correct? Therefore, people should imitate them if they want to get themselves out of the doldrums of their reality.

In just the past few weeks, there have been floods in Pakistan, mine collapses in Chile, leaks of highly sensitive U.S. military documents, bombings in Iraq, and dozens of other truly important and world-shaping events. While they have thankfully been given their fair time online where all interested parties can see them, they are still sequestered in a dark corner of media known as “that nasty stuff.” The high gloss magazine covers at the supermarket checkout are still covered with the cheesy grins of pseudo-important individuals, perpetuating the consumption of “junk food news.”

How can this cycle of mental and social decay be broken? First, drop the magazines and TV shows. Nine times out of 10, they are not reputable and only exist to make a quick buck, not inform a reader. Certain publications have more socio-political credibility than others, but even they are starting to use pop news more often than in the past. How will you get information without them? Research is the only way. You must keep your eyes and ears open at all times and make use of the most unbiased sources you can find, such as international news organizations such as the BBC and public radio and television, whenever a snippet of information you find important enters your thoughts. If more and more people begin to take the responsibility of staying informed into their own hands, the empty media we consume will begin to fall by the wayside, cutting into the profits, and hopefully the consciences, of those in command of the information. Once this has been done, it will only be a matter of time before the news the people want and the news the outlets provide are one and the same.

“Vampires Suck” is just another parody
Jessica Benigno
Online Editor

Stephanie Meyer’s infamous “Twilight” Saga has once again made me want to simultaneously laugh and throw popcorn at the screen. If you’re interested in another silly parody movie with overly-obvious jokes and characters getting hit on the head with random objects, then “Vampires Suck” is worth the while. But if you were hoping for a comedic gem full of witty jokes and a loathing of ravenous Team-whoever fans - as I was - then you will be very disappointed.

“Vampires Suck”, written and directed by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer, is basically the plot of the first two “Twilight” movies with more ridiculous jokes and situations added in. Personally, it felt like I watching a really bad remake of “Twilight” and “New Moon” filmed by college students.  The jokes about the characters were so painfully obvious and overdone that some of them weren’t even funny.  

Cinematically, the movie wasn’t breathtaking, but the directors did a decent job at recreating the scenes and surroundings that were found in the “Twilight” and “New Moon” movies. The characters all look very similar to their original counterparts and the actors also did a decent job at recreating some of the more hilarious quirks that the original cast had. In the original “Twilight” movie, Bella has a shy and slightly twitchy personality, but in “Vampires Suck”, the actress took the twitch to a whole new level, which helped her comedic cause. Jacob, of course, is shirtless for most of the movie and Edward’s bouffant hair is exceptionally fluffy.

The movie wasn’t all bad, however. I did enjoy the way Friedberg and Seltzer poked fun at the pre-teen fans of “Twilight”. Throughout the movie, but especially at the end, Team Jacob and Team Edward fans battle it out over their obsessions with the two characters. The one time I really did laugh hard enough to spill my popcorn was the very end of the movie. I won’t spoil it, but I’ll tell you that there’s a Team Jacob fan and a spiked club involved. 

I’d give this movie a C+, mostly because of its amusing fan-bashing jokes. The acting was subpar, but wasn’t so bad that it distracted me from the rest of the scene. In addition, the characters were funny enough, but their humorous characteristics were blown way out of proportion. Seeing as Friedberg and Seltzer are both relatively new on the movie making scene, this is a decent first try, but I hope that they move away from the parody theme. It’s a dying genre anyways.

Cartoon by Natalie Thomas